SNAPSHOTS OF THE RISING TIDES — A MED SCHOOL MEMOIR.
Being in med school, I’d say, has been the longest ride of my life. If I were to talk about every moment therein, I’d fill volumes of books. I’ll keep it simple, hoping not to dilute the impact
every moment has had on me. I really hope that my vulnerability here will encourage those younger than me.
Biggest hurdle
~Adapting into med school
Before med school, (after form 4) I was a bit deluded and I remember telling my family ” I easily
adapt into new surroundings, I can settle down in a new environment and into a new life so
easily” Little did I know that my first year would prove me wrong.
Not once did I feel settled, neither did I ever feel as though I belonged. It was turmoil for me,
the lowest season of my life. Time seemed to move, seasons came and passed, lecturers came
and left, but I remained stuck. I couldn’t feel my essence, I felt detached even from myself.
Hallmark movies became my solace, Monday to Monday, never to tell what day of the week it
was. Even socially, I was tripping, save for my then dude I was seeing who was the only “thing”
I’d call a friend, truly.
Anatomy was difficult, physiology slipped through my fingers, biochem was confusing,
behavioral Science, bearable. I dropped off med school, sought a side hustle. Came back to
school after pops refused to condone my “unseriousness’ after he refused to sponsor me thru a
different course( I don’t wanna mention it, lest u drown in laughter)
Will I really survive? Will I really make it to second year? All along, I had synthetic smiles, tossed
about by the winds, day and night, I lost weight, I had fevers, body malaise (but no TB, no
malignancy ) I was just sad, depressed to be precise.
However, somehow, I knew God was watching.
That year, I made it
COVID ~A perpetuating factor to my then underlying troubles. I lost it! I officially dropped off from medschool, I absconded my studies and my exams, I told my parents that I’d die if I stayed in medschool. I started engaging more in the film and theatre industry. Who knows, I’d have become the next Julia Roberts.(Chuckles) That year, I failed!
I was 3 years into med school, still lost, still lonely, in a messy relationship, unsettled, fatigued.
My foundations academically, spiritually were being tested. I hadn’t yet learnt how to adapt and
how to deal with challenges yet.
POST-COVID ~Turn- around point
Pain has been attributed with the ability to break or form a human being. In my second tenure in 3rd year, I wept , I wrestled with God.
“Father, I make up my mind to give my best in med school, it isn’t easy for me. But I have made up my mind to be here. Walk with me”
The verse about a double minded man not receiving anything from God became so close to me.
Everyday, I had to remind myself of the commitment I’d made. It was hard. That year, I wrestled with God. I asked Him to heal the broken pieces. I became intentional on my school work, I was a struggling student but I sure did my best. The strides and the progress was minimal, but I was moving.
SILVER LINING ~God gave me a friend.
I’m an introvert, seeking out people is the last thing I do. God knew that, He formed me. In my 4th year, (This was a new class that I was still trying to acclimatize to) God gave me a friend.
Along the way, through my senior years, I’d see a change in attitude and perspective from within. I’d feel the growth in my personal life. I’d feel the weight lifting off every single day,
boldness found it’s way to me, I started learning how to study, how to live, how to thrive through my God given personality, gifts and talents. Now i know that it onlyh seems impossible until it’s done! You can do it!!
SOCIALLY
I’ve been blessed with amazing friends along the way, genuine souls. I’ve enjoyed the gift of friendship and for that I’m grateful. I’ve made mistakes, but truly, they have all drawn me closer to Yahweh, my God.
I’ve had crushes, I’ve been crushed on, I’ve admired some, I have been admired, I’ve been loved, I’ve loved. I have rejected, I’ve been rejected, I’ve been wounded, yet I’ve healed. I have been enriched and poured into by those younger, wiser and funnier than myself.
SPIRITUALLY
I have known the Lord. I have learnt and loved His word. I have Iearnt to pray. I have wept on my knees, I have felt forsaken, I have despaired,I have felt lost, I have been restored. I have
sinned, I have been forgiven. Campus has taught me: God is not a myth, I have seen His hand.
C.U has been a shelter.
PARTING SHORT.
Read the word, pray. Love the Lord. Love His children.
Our paths are different, but He remains faithful to us all His children.
Do you feel forsaken? Lonely? Troubled? Sinful? Defeated? I’ve been there, and I stand today to say,
The Lord is my refuge and my stronghold, my God in whom I trust .
He is closer than we think. Unshaken, unstartled by our inadequacies.
One thing only, be better today than you were yesterday
